What do you consider to be your most sacred feelings? If you’re like me, you might tend to gravitate towards the “positive” emotions like joy, love, generosity, thoughtfulness, humility. Those are all, indeed, sacred ways of being. But what about rage? What about anger, fury, or grief? How might we consider these so-called “negative” emotions as expressions of our own divinity? These feelings may not be comfortable for everyone; they are often shamed, pushed aside, or stuffed down. Yet when we learn to approach our rage as a necessary part of our Energetic Intelligence, it becomes sacred - a powerful form of creative destruction. Right now, there is a lot of rage in the world, and we have the opportunity to use our rage as a force for good.
One of the tenets of Energetic Intelligence is that “feeling good” requires us to fully feel all of our feelings, not just the comfortable ones or the ones we deem positive. To "feel good" means to get really good at feeling all of the feelings - without necessarily speaking or taking action from inside of them. Feeling good means doing the work necessary to be adept at noticing and distinguishing feelings - ours and other peoples', then choosing to fully accept all of them as a sacred part of humanity. From there, we can choose and take actions that align with and advance our commitments.
Right now, you might feel called to do things that make you feel better. You might not want to feel the rage, despair, or the discomfort of transformation. And yet our world has been undergoing transformation, whether we’ve felt ready or not. We’re living amid a global pandemic. Job insecurity, violence, and systemic injustice are bubbling to the forefront of our collective consciousness. You might have the privilege of turning a blind eye to the protests and riots going on all over the country, but we are all deeply, energetically connected. Noticing, feeling, and accepting only your feelings is cutting you off from the vastness of humanity and the human experience. Are you allowing yourself to feel it, or are you draining our collective energy by just trying to make yourself feel better?
It’s time to get good at feeling: sitting with your own feelings, especially the uncomfortable ones, like what you feel when you look in the mirror and see your own biases, prejudices, and problematic paradigms. Do you feel righteous? Do you feel scared? Do you feel exhilarated at the prospect of transformation? Do you feel resistant? Feel what you feel, but if you truly want to feel good, you must be willing to be with the grief, fear, and rage in this world without stifling it for your own comfort and need to feel better. To feel good, you must prioritize BEING better over feeling better.
Here’s how to be better by taking responsibility for your sacred rage:
1. Notice it.
Since many of us tend to push uncomfortable feelings down below the surface, our unmanaged rage can manifest as aches, pains, and even disease. Sitting quietly, scan through your body to notice any tightness or sensation that comes up when you bring to mind any anger or frustration. Notice the sensation that arises and breathe deeply.
2. Name it to Tame it
Name the feeling for what it is, rather than brushing it off as unimportant. Oftentimes we numb out or avoid our “negative” feelings because we don’t know what they are. Getting clear about what you’re feeling and why will allow you to resolve it.
3. Release it.
Get mad on purpose and on your own schedule. Actually schedule 5 minutes in your day to scream into a pillow or dance out your rage. Setting aside time in your day to feel your anger constructively allows you to release pent up emotion rather than letting it rule you.
Pleasant sensations are not the only sacred ones. Anger can be channeled into loving actions. Rage can fuel words and actions of love and loving impact. We must be responsible for our feelings if we want them to fuel actions that align with our highest, soul-level commitments and create a greater, more loving world for all.